The movie begins right where the show left off, with Hollywood hottie Vinny Chase (Adrian Grenier) looking for work. Agent Ari Gold (Jeremy Piven) offers him a chance to star in and direct the new summer blockbuster, some weird kind of The Dark Knight mixed with Eden and Baltimore police riot footage. It’s laughably bad, but everyone else in the movie seems to think it’s great, so when the totally legitimate request for even more funding comes in, the entourage have to combat stubborn wealthy Texans Billy Bob Thornton and Haley Joel Osment for additional millions of dollars. The outrageous celebrity cameos don’t stop there: Warren Buffett, Common, Mike Tyson, Ronda Rousey, Kid Cudi, Jessica Alba, and numerous others, are included to distract you from the horrors of this movie. Emily Ratajkowski, the girl from the “Blurred Lines” video and Nick Dunne’s secret high school love interest in Gone Girl, plays Vinny Chase’s new love interest, but she doesn’t even speak in the movie. She stands there and looks pretty, along with a bunch of other female characters in this movie who either have sex with a member of the entourage or stand in the background topless.
Honestly, why did this movie have to happen? It’s 2015, and the last thing the world needs is a movie about stupidly rich white males who objectify women and the only black people they know are their office assistants. It’s doing fanservice to a show about irreverent douchebags, and it’s not even funny to watch anymore- it’s just painful. HBO released Entourage as a cash cow for themselves, because we know there are much better HBO movies this year that deserve more attention (Going Clear, Montage of Heck). It’s not even that great a movie for fans of the show because the story of this movie is just a rehashed one from its later seasons; it plays the same familial trope between Vinny and big brother Drama it always uses when it doesn’t have any better ideas, and all the blue-eyed boys win in the end with no consequences. Why can’t the Mark Wahlbergs of the world realize that this hypertextual L.A. guy gang is a group of assholes in today’s society that no one wants to hear from ever? They’re like that Successful White Man meme you see sometimes and groan about, except it’s a 104 minute movie about them and their “problems.”
Entourage is not worth your time or money. To put it bluntly; it’s misogynistic, exclusive, and ignorant. The conflict-resolution of it is entirely predictable and even with a movie-sized budget, there’s nothing especially exciting or dangerous that goes on. The best part of the movie was when someone flipped off the projector once the credits started rolling. I wish I was the person who did that.