• Home
  • Meetings
  • Events
  • Blog
  • E-Board
  • Around Boston
NUFEC
.

Anu Gulati on The Secret Life of Pets

7/8/2016

0 Comments

 
Picture
​Made by those behind the multi-billion dollar atrocity that is the Despicable Me minions, The Secret Life of Pets begins by imagining what domestic animals in New York City do when their owners leave for work every day. It’s main storyline is an exact ripoff of Toy Story, replacing the toys with pets: owner loves pet, owner brings in competition, competition and original pet get lost and have to find their way home but also find friendship between them in the interim. The initial trailer with comedian-voiced dogs (Louis C.K, Hannibal Buress, Kevin Hart, Bobby Moynihan, Dana Carvey, etc) blasting System of a Down and barking incessantly at squirrels showed promise and ingenuity despite it’s hugely unoriginal plot.

For the movie’s Saturday at 10am screening, my hungover state of being was not fit for this theater full of children’s laughter and bright images, but through all of my nausea I could tell that The Secret Life of Pets was nothing but spoon-fed entertainment with all promises properly fabricated by movie trailer-makers. The funny trailer turns out to be an opening montage that lays the groundwork for a bland retread of Toy Story’s “how do you know what happens if you’re not there?” gimmick, but barely scrapes the barrel with this idea like Toy Story did with a much more engaging and pleasing reality.

Boisterous young terrier Max (the OG pet, voiced by Louis C.K.) and wooly Newfoundland Duke (Eric Stonestreet) find themselves swallowed by the dangerous New York City streets and sewer systems, and their adventures don’t lack in energy. They fall into a sausage factory and sing a Grease-inspired “We Go Together” rendition vis-à-vis sausages, run into trouble with a group of rejected sewer pets led by a vicious but adorably animated bunny (Kevin Hart), and are constantly being chased by a goofy pair of human animal control workers whose fruitless attempts at capture are silent-film reminiscent. All the while, other household pets (also all voiced by comedians) are on the search for Max and Duke, and this litter of pet personalities provides a variety of entertainment for the children, while references to films like The Fugitive and Some Like it Hot are enough to produce an adult chuckle here and there.

I’ve been trying to avoid sounding as ADD as the movie itself, but The Secret Life of Pets is overstuffed with dancing wiener sequences and butt-sniffing gags that it leaves no room for emotional payoff or character investment. All of it’s quick jokes seem to go against the calculated nature of it’s stand-up comedian cast, and it’s endless jests will have it’s audience leaving the theater with no recollection of substantive material. I hate to make the Pixar comparison here, but if you’re going to the theater to see an animated movie this weekend, I do suggest Finding Dory over this one.

Unlike similarly animal-centric like this year’s Zootopia (which is magnitudes better), The Secret Life of Pets is a void of entertainment that avoids all sharp turns into actual topics like the domestication of pets and the inhumanity of abandoning them to deliver an ending with no heartfelt message to send the kids home with. It’s excessive marketing through television airtime, Snapchat filters, and train car posters gives me PTSD flashbacks to last year’s Minions appearing on, and consequently destroying, everything I loved, but at least these animals are cutely animated with their fluff that just begs to be petted. The most amusing time I had with The Secret Life of Pets was walking home post-screening and strolling alongside real-life dogs on leashes, being led by their owners with loyalty. I imagined what they would be saying and laughed to myself as I pictured the tiny lap dogs having thoughts of violent world domination. If only.

Grade: D
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Categories

    All
    AJ Martin
    Andy Robinson
    Anime
    Anthony Formicola
    Anu Gulati
    Arjun Agarwal
    Arzu Martinez
    Ben Garbow
    Brandon Isaacson
    Brian Hamilton
    Carter Sigl
    Dan Simeone
    Discussion
    Elizabeth Johnson Wilson
    Eliza Rosenberry
    Emily Fisler
    Erick Sanchez
    Eric Tatar
    Essays
    Festivals
    Gabrielle Ulubay
    Grace Phalon
    Haley Emerson
    Here's Some Movies
    Ian Wolff
    IFF Boston
    IFFBoston 2015
    Interviews
    Isaac Feldberg
    Kunal Asarsa
    Library
    Lists
    Marguerite Darcy
    Marissa Marchese
    Marli Dorn
    Mary Tobin
    Meghan Murphy
    Mike Muse
    Mitch Macro
    Neel Shah
    Netflix Instant Watch
    Parth Parekh
    Patrick Roos
    Profiles
    Reviews
    Short Films
    Television
    This Week In Movies
    Tyler Rosini

    Want to Write for Us?

    Contact NUFEC at [email protected] if you're interested in writing for this blog!

    Archives

    October 2024
    December 2023
    November 2023
    October 2023
    April 2022
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    October 2019
    September 2019
    June 2019
    April 2019
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015
    December 2014
    November 2014
    October 2014
    September 2014
    August 2014
    July 2014
    June 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    March 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014
    December 2013
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013

    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.